A Quiet yet Messy Rebellion!

 

  Since the day we brought River home from the hospital he has been in rebellion against burp clothes.  I'm not sure where this hatred originated, perhaps during a mid afternoon nap he dreamt of evil burp clothes trying to rid the world of his mommy.  Wherever this hatred has come from though, it has resulted in a refusal to spit up on this designated and convenient spot.
  I started with rags that were relatively small-the same ones that were good enough for my elder son, Israel.  After the many outfit changes to both baby and mommy, I reasonably configured to enlarge the cloth.  Assuming this to be a faultless course of action, I was disappointed to find that River had once again gotten the best of me.  During my next wardrobe change, I again contemplated a solution.
  Forget burp clothes all together, I'll just use receiving blankets!  Ah hah!  Infallible!  Well the next feeding came and I had my ego all prepared for success, but to my astonishment he puked down my back, completely avoiding the entire foot of material hanging off of my shoulder! 
Errr....I knew this was nothing less than intentional and to prove it we need to look at all of the facts...
 1.  River sometimes smiles or laughs afterwards
 2.  River will always get me no matter what sort of precautions I take
 3.  dare I act smug or satisfied at the end of a feeding when I haven't received a puke bath, River 
 will get me hours later when I am least expecting it, and with such accuracy, that you would think I
  was wearing a bulls eye!  and finally,
 4.  he NEVER pukes on anyone else who has a burp cloth (even the teeniest, tiniest variety)!!
And it's this final point that is the most important. 
  Last Sunday, our church had a meal after the service.  So I'm at this carry-in, sitting with some friends, when Tara asks me if she can hold River.  Excited to eat a meal with both hands, I pass him along for some Tara-time.  I walked to the food table to load my plate with some good eatin's, and with my plate overloaded I headed back to our table.
  As I approach, Tara says, "Oh, he spit up a little," and of course, not on her I might add.  So I reach into the diaper bag and get the burp cloth to wipe him off.  As I lean in, she turns River to face me when to my surprise, I see spit up in the EXACT shape of an exclamation point!!
Since then, I've surrendered to the idea that I will ever again have a dry day, and that the burp cloth will NEVER serve it's purpose!  No subtlety necessary River, point proven, I'll buy a poncho!